As I see myself lying on the ground,
I could feel the hurt from my open wound.
Wondering if this new pain that I felt,
was lesser than the pain I had dwelt.
The gun that I shot to myself,
would my dream paradise be out in my shelf?
A paradise not full of regret,
a life full of freedom that I will never forget.
If you ask me what my life has been,
it feels like a robot having its own routine.
What you’re going through doesn’t matter,
if you learn how to fake your laughter.
After believing everything will be alright,
disappointments will rub salt in your wounded heart.
Accepting that you’ll never be okay,
because happiness won’t stay.
Always living like a tool,
couldn’t fixed itself like a fool.
I might be right about me;
being a big mistake was all I could be.
I believe that for a certain,
people will always feel like I’m a burden.
If self-pity is what this poem for,
this could go on I assure.
But as I talk about my new paradise,
I found out something new otherwise.
If you wonder if I’m happy now in my new paradise,
I say paradise doesn’t mean you need to end the sacrifice.
You will never be contented in a world full of your desire;
it would feel like you were suffocated in a closed door fire.
Life was made with balance,
like the presence of sound & silence.
Within tears and sorrow,
comes laughter and new tomorrow.
It’s late to realize a living heaven made by God,
a paradise made that must be given glory and laud.
Life would be so much bore,
if happiness is what we only lived for.
If I just knew what life awaits me,
If I just knew what death could teach me.
I wish I never asked for this new paradise,
because my dream paradise is just world full of lies.
*Photo Credits to the owner*